This second everything changes, in this one second, you enter into this alternate dimension, into this alternate world, where he is no longer there, where he is missing. This second your life changes, you change, the situation around you changes, the people around you change and there is no going back. You feel like everything around you is breaking down and your life is nothing but a big black hole now filled with darkness. When someone you love dies, you cannot get over it, the loss is now a part of who you are. Time cannot change things and there is no moving on. Some pains never fade away. Time can never heal you and the pain will never go. It's not going to be easy. It's hard and its going to be harder. The reality is you will grieve forever. You can never 'get over' the loss of a loved one, you will learn to live with it. You can never see him in your tomorrow. Grief feels so much like fear.
Fear of tomorrow.
Fear of losing people you love again.
Fear of being loved again.
Fear of not being able to see the person you love again.
It's not going to be easy, it's going to be hard. There are things you can never share. Something's are kept in your heart forever.
Death is painful because he goes away to a place from there is no returning back.
You can never LISTEN to his voice.
You can never FEEL him.
You can never TALK to him.
You can never SEE him.
What it meant to lose him no one will ever know. Its hard to forget who gave you so much to remember. Some precious memories, they will always be, until you meet again, another day.
Life is so unpredictable, if you love someone show them gratitude and let them know how important they are in your life before it's too late because life is too short. YOU WILL NEVER KNOW THE VALUE OF A MOMENT UNTIL IT BECOMES A MEMORY. We will never know what will happen the next second , we never know what might happen in an eye blink. When someone you love dies, it is irreplaceable, no one can take away that place.
The void will always remain.
The pain will always be.
The void will always stay.
There are things you want to forget but you can't, you keep remembering the things you want to forget, BUT,
REMEMBER,
It's not always the same, there will be a second where life changes again and you will meet him again, another day.
Death is inevitable, it happens in a microsecond. This microsecond changes everything around you. This microsecond came into my life. I'm no longer the person I used to be nor do I want to be that person anymore nor should I be that person anymore.
TITU,
THE BEST GIFTS OF GOD.
THE BEST BROTHER IN THE WORLD.
When I lost you, I lost a part of me too,
You left a hole in me, that no one will ever be able to see.
I feel guilty, for not spending enough time with you, maybe I'd feel the same even if I had spent a 100 years with you, but that's because I love you.
It's hard to believe that I spent 2 years without you!
It's hard to believe that I have to live life like this forever.
Life feels incomplete, this house feels incomplete, there is no happiness.
I wish we were together,
I wish I wasn't this person,
I wish today never came.
It's tough, it's going to be tough because journey without you is so long,
Every year feels like a decade.
Life doesn't feel complete.
Happiness is missing.
You are missing.
No one knows the heartache behind this smile.
No one knows how many times I've broken down and cried.
I'm unable to do all the things we used to do.
I have no one to tell I love you too.
Or give a kiss before going to bed.
Maybe I'm selfish to have you in my life,
But,
I want those 100 kisses you give me everyday,
I want to sing songs with you again,
I want to play games with you again,
I want to annoy you again,
I want you to annoy me again,
I want to do all those things we used to do once again, for one last time.
I want to talk to you for one last time.
I want to listen to your voice for one last time.
I want to carry you in my arms for one last time.
I want to show you how much I love you.
The more I think about you, the more I get hurt.
The more I feel like spending time with you, I feel like I should've hugged you tighter and longer the last time I saw you.
I feel you when I see your pictures.
I feel you when I listen to songs.
I feel you in every tear I shed.
I feel you in the wind.
I feel you in the air.
I feel you in every breath I take.
But it hurts, every time I feel you I get hurt, because of the pain you had to take while you were there.
You weren't any normal kid, you were a fighter, you are the strongest kid I've ever seen. You took in a lot of pain, a pain no one can ever imagine of, it is not something a 7 year old deserves.
You took in a lot of pain you were not supposed to.
You took in a lot of pain you were not supposed to.
It's not easy, there are things that can never be forgotten, I wish we never had to say goodbye. Never in my life had I thought I'd live a day like this without you.
I want to cry out loud.
I want to scream out loud.
I want to scream out your name.
But,
Maybe it's for the best that you left.
You deserve a better place, you tiny little baby don't deserve pain, you deserve happiness, you deserve much more love than I used to give. You deserve a better world.
Another world where there are better people.
Another world where you will be taken good care of.
Another world where you will be playing with God.
Another world which is filled only with happiness.
Another world where you are meant to be.
Another world which you deserve.
Because there is no more pain, no more problems, no more sadness.
Death is inevitable, but there are things that can never die. Though death might part us love will always be. Love will always remain.
I will keep with me all the good and bad times we shared,
I want you to know how much I really cared, until we meet again another day.
Until we meet again, I will love you the same now and everyday.
I LOVE YOU FOREVER TITU ❤
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